More updates - no pictures

I had the final walk-through on my new house this evening.  Things are looking good, and I am scheduled to close tomorrow.  The parrots, Andreas, and I are about to own a house again!  Perhaps the most exciting thing about this is that the parrots can be as loud as they'd like, and it won't matter!

In a fun development, the previous owner left some stained glass panels on the 3rd floor for me.  It will be fun to figure out where they were and to see if I can reinstall them.  I love stained glass!

The past few weeks have been filled with studying.  I had to take some securities exams over the past year, and I just passed the third (and hardest) exam this morning.  I wanted to get it done before I moved.  I wasn't sure I would pass, so I was ecstatic to see the results.  Now, on to packing.  Except instead of packing tonight, I am drinking a celebratory beer and posting on my blog!

I'm hoping to move a few things over myself tomorrow (my new house is about half a mile from my current apartment.)  My mom is coming up on Saturday and she'll help me clean things up and we'll move things in our cars.  Then, on Sunday (Father's Day), my dad is coming up with the van he can borrow from work, and we'll move some of the larger stuff, including the animals.

I have hired movers for July 5 to move my bed, the couches, bookshelves, and other heavy things.  My dad is getting older and I didn't want to be responsible for throwing out his back!  One exciting part of this is how many people have offered to help me move.  Even my downstairs neighbors, the college kids, have offered their help.  There are so many good, kind people in this world.

It still amazes me how different my current life is from the one I used to live.  Better.

In which Max makes me laugh

I'll admit it. I am a happy person and laugh a lot.

My therapist told me this is not always a good thing, as I endured years of abuse at Thomas's hands, thinking I was happy.  Yikes!  Interesting to think that I could have escaped years earlier.

But now that I am no longer in an (emotionally & verbally) abusive relationship, I am very glad that I have a high happiness base line.I think that's a good thing. 

I recently listened to a lecture on human behavior, and I learned that 50% of happiness is due to genetics, 10% is circumstances, and 40% is our behavior and how we react to things.  I am glad that my 50% genetics = happiness as I really only have control over 40% of my own happiness!

Max makes me laugh every single day. 

Currently, she is obsessed with the dark bathroom.

Here, she looks like she may want me to give her head pets; instead, she is just interested in heading to the bathroom.   She is a trickster!

As an aside, I may need to consider my parrots' opinions in great music.  They love Father John Misty, heard here, and his music is frequently listed as the best of 2012.

Note to record producers: I will loan out my parrots' expertise to tell you if you have a winner or not :)

Mid-September Update

Hello my dear blog friends,

Yet again, a month has gone by with very few posts and very few pictures taken. I intend to get back to a more normal posting schedule soon, but I've been intending to do so for months now! In any case, please do not take my silence for despair or sadness; on the contrary, things are great!

I think part of me didn't want to post because Thomas knows about the blog and I didn't want him knowing what's going on with my life. But then I realized that he just doesn't care. It kind of boggles my mind, but it's true.  He is never going to check the blog, because we are all dead to him.  So I can write whatever I want!

During one of the last times I had to speak with him, about selling the house (It's final and sold!) I mentioned that Rocky had been adopted and asked if he wanted to know about his new family, and he flat out said no, that he didn't care.

I'm not sure if this is false bravado after realizing that he's lost the only beings who ever loved him (me, my family, and the parrots) or if he really doesn't care, but I'm leaning toward the latter.  I've done a ton of reading on people with personality disorders, so I can understand, on an intellectual level, what is going on with him, but it's still hard for me to really understand what it's like to live that way.

In any case, after making that realization, I now feel safe to post.

The parrots are all doing extremely well.  My job is more demanding of my time, so I don't have as much time to spend with them as I'd like, but they are adjusting.

Here's a picture of Calypso, when he went from his stand to the plant that was next to his stand.  Luckily for him, it is perch-like as I did a bad job of rotating it so it didn't grow evenly!

Max is as sweet as ever.  She loves wandering around the house, looking for me.  She's kind of like a dog that way.  I figure it's good exercise for her, and since it's just me in the house, I don't have to worry about her getting stepped on.  Usually she flies, so she can land on my arm, but sometimes she walks.

Here she is after a bath a couple of days ago.  My mom and I were painting, and Max decided to keep us company.

As for me, work is going really, really well.  Long hours, but I knew that going in.  When Thomas left us just as I'd finished paying for him to go to medical school, right before he was to start actually contributing to the household, and just after I found out I was losing my well-paying job, I was a bit worried about what kind of job I'd be able to find and how I'd be able to support us, since cheaper places wouldn't allow birds.  I am happy to say that I have landed on my feet.  I will most likely buy a house in the spring, and I can't wait to make it all mine!  And the parrots', of course!

I love our new neighborhood!  I can go weeks without using my car, as I usually walk or take the bus to work, and grocery shopping, many of my friends, and tons of things to do are within a half mile of my apartment.  My bike is currently being fixed up, and then I will become a bicycle commuter.  I can't wait!

I have been dating a bit -- a lot of bad first dates -- I will have to relay some of the stories here in the future.  But I've recently met someone who is a bit promising.  It's still really early on, but we laugh for hours, have tons in common, and he is super good-looking!  And he lives less than a mile from me! 

The last 7 or so years of my marriage, I can't remember Thomas complimenting me.  Medical school, residency, and fellowship changed him.  He'd tell me I was fat (I'm a size 4), or that I was ugly and looked like a man (not true) -- which I laughed off as I thought he was joking.  But now I think that he was serious and trying to make me unhappy because he is a fundamentally unhappy person and misery loves company.  It's so great to be around friends and family that are so nice to me!  I was trying to think of the last time someone was mean to me, and I couldn't remember.  It had to have been Thomas, but it's so insignificant now that I can't even remember the specific incident.

Sometimes I get angry at myself for staying in a bad marriage for so long.  I thought I was happy, and I didn't recognize it as a bad marriage.  Why did I not realize when I was being verbally and emotionally abused?  My therapist told me it was like I was in a one-man cult, and I'm such a happy, positive person that I didn't let it get me down.  But that I have to be very careful in recognizing red flags and acting on them so that I don't waste more years in another terrible relationship, with someone who doesn't deserve me.  I have done so much reading and introspection, and I'm glad that I got out when I was young enough to create a new, wonderful life for myself.

Anyway, by putting this out on the blog, I am hoping to start regular posting again.  I love being able to go back throughout the years and see what I was doing this time of year in 2009, for example, and the future me will probably be upset with the present me for not writing regularly!

Living with the enemy

I've been thinking about writing a post like this for quite a while, ever since I realized how many people were finding my blog by doing searches on phrases like "I hate my macaw."  This just breaks my heart, and I hope that those who would bother doing such searches are looking for ways to improve their relationship with their parrot.  Maybe this post can help.  There are no easy answers or quick fixes, but with the dedication of all of the humans in the house, I truly believe that an solution that is amenable to everyone can be found.

As anyone who's read more than a few entries of this blog knows, I live with a severe macaw who prefers my husband and wishes he could drive me out of the house so the two of them could live happily ever after.  I know my husband won't leave me for a macaw, so Rocky and I needed to figure out a way to live in harmony.  This duty would fall mainly on me since I am the human.  And, much as I wish it were otherwise, you can't really reason with a macaw.

Over the years, we've worked out a system that works incredibly well.  The steps I took are ones that can be helpful in solving most parrot behavior issues.  These are not necessarily in order, or even in order of importance.  But I do believe they are all important, and if I try to craft a perfect entry, this will never get posted.

1. Changing my attitude.  As I've written before, since I had a fair amount of parrot experience before adopting Rocky, I felt confident that I'd be able to win him over and make him equally tame to both of us.  As it became clearer that Rocky was an extreme one-person bird intent on driving me out of the flock, I began to despair.  None of my tricks were working!  He'd rather bite my hand than take his favorite food from me, even if he was hungry!

It made me question my fitness as a parrot-owner, and it made me start to have negative feelings toward him.  Ultimately, I realized this isn't fair to Rocky.  He is a wild animal and shouldn't be in captivity.  In the wild, he'd need those skills to drive off competitors for his partner's affection.  It wasn't anything personal, and parrots aren't good judges of character.

Additionally, I realized that parrots are experts at picking up on our body language.  If I didn't like him, he'd know, and that would just feed into our disagreements.  I'd decided to bring him into my house, and it was my responsibility to give him the best life I could.  Plus, there's a good chance that he could be with us for much of the rest of our lives.  Since we were committed to him, I could live out those years angry about the way he treated me, or I could get over it.  I chose the latter.

That's not to say there aren't days when I want to strangle him and wonder what I was thinking back in 2006 when we brought him home.  But, overall, changing my attitude and looking at that quirky little guy with a mixture of bemusement and love has really improved things.

2. Adjusting my expectations.  As I've mentioned before, I was so confident that I'd win him over and that he'd be tame to both of us.  After all, Max had, at one point, started to prefer me, but we worked through that and now she liked us both.  Surely the same thing would happen with Rocky!

Except, that didn't happen.  He, like many severe macaws, is an extreme one-person bird, completely immune to my charms.  I realized that Thomas and I would never have the same relationship with Rocky.  And that would be OK.  Over the years, I've forged my own relationship with him.  It's hard to explain, but, in some way, he considers me part of his flock.  He'll scream if I leave the room as he wants us to be together for dinner.  He'll sing to and dance with me.  He likes to be near me when Thomas is gone.

I must add that most birds are not as extreme one-person as Rocky is.  But, just as we humans have different relationships with different people (I have a far different reaction if my husband, or a stranger, or someone I don't like tries to hug me!), it's only natural the same might apply to parrots. 

3. Being observant. Most parrots are very demonstrative with their body language.  I've found this to be particularly true with the new-world species: macaws, amazons, caiques, etc.  For me, the greys and cockatoos are a bit harder to read, but their body language can be learned through careful study and experience.

Quite frankly, if Rocky bites someone, it's pretty much their fault for ignoring his warning signs and pushing past his comfort zone.  Note: this does not apply if he were to leap at someone.  I mean, how much clearer could he be?

I really want to bite you!  Look how big and scary I am!!!

I really recommend that people who have parrots with aggression issues should keep a journal (or blog!) of their experiences, which can help make patterns show more clearly.  Then, you can use that knowledge to arrange the environment for success (see below.)  Armed with a journal, you can notice patterns.  Or, if you have a good memory, you may not need a journal.  For example, Rocky will even bite Thomas if Thomas wears certain clothes, tries to pick him up in the hallway, or if Rocky's just in a bad mood and giving off warnings.

4. Arranging the environment for success. Although I am a proponent of flight for captive parrots, this is not always possible.  Rocky is allowed to fly now, but he's been clipped in the past for jumping me.  Armed with your observations (see above), you can begin figuring out ways to arrange the environment for success.

I will give some examples of what we've done in our house.  Since Rocky tends to stalk and attack my feet unless I have a stick in my hand (he steps up on the stick, averting an attack, I don't beat him with it!) he's not allowed out of his cage when I change foods and waters as my hands and mind are otherwise occupied.

Speaking of sticks, that's another example.  I needed to have a way to move Rocky around and to thwart an attack.  We stick trained him and I always keep a stick near me.  If he's coming to attack, I just have him step up, which diffuses the situation.

Rocky has been known to jump me, but only when my back is turned.  He's a bit cowardly, but I'm grateful for that fact, as that just means I need to look at him to avert an attack.  This may involve walking backwards out of a room.

If I sit on the couch normally and he's out, there's a good chance he'll come over to attack my feet.  Solution?  I bring my legs and feet on the couch to safety.

I could come up with many more examples, but I think this might be getting old.  Basically, it is far easier for me to change (e.g. sit with my legs on the couch) than to change Rocky (e.g. train him not to attack my feet on the ground.)  He didn't ask to live with us (well, me at least -- he did instantly bond to Thomas at the rescue, but he had no idea what was in store for him by making THAT choice!) so at least I can meet him part way.

5. Being safe.  This encompasses many of the above comments.  When you live with a biter, the last thing you want to do is give him opportunities to practice biting.  As with anything, practice makes perfect!  I recommend figuring out ways to prevent attacks rather than reacting to them.  Watch body language, stick train, know where the bird is at all times so he can't launch a sneak attack, make sure all people in the home know the rules.

Speaking of that, at the rescue, I am amazed at the number of people who use one-person parrots as a weapon.  The bird only likes one person, and that favored person uses the parrot to settle scores with the unfavored person.  Ultimately, the bird loses.

But it doesn't have to be so nefarious on the part of the other person to have the same result.  Thomas and I now have a rule that if he's letting Rocky out, he's got to tell me.  I remember writing about this when it happened, but a few years back, I assumed that Rocky was in his cage as that's the last place I'd seen him and Thomas was getting ready for work, so I didn't think he'd let him out.  I was drying my hair in the bathroom with the door open.  Result: I couldn't hear the tell-tale "click click" of his talons as he traversed the floor looking for his prey (i.e. me.)  I first knew he was there as I simultaneously heard a scream of victory and felt his beak on my toes.  Luckily I have very fast reaction times, so no serious damage was done.

6. Developing our own routines/fun.  This is very important, and goes along with adjusting expectations.  I can't do most of the things that Rocky and Thomas do together.  Things that involve physical touch.  I can, however, do things with him that don't involve the possibility of getting bit.

For example, I put on his favorite music and we sing and dance.  We play fetch where I throw a toy for him and he brings it back to me.  We exchange fake coughs.  Every night, we spend several minutes repeating "Gimme a kiss! *kiss kiss kiss*" to each other.  He sticks his foot through the cage and I touch his feet.  Granted, he then fake bites his leg as he quickly brings it back in the cage and gives me an evil look, probably disappointed that my finger didn't go through the cage for a bite.

Over the years, we've developed dozens of routines and games that reinforce our bond, however different that bond is from the one he shares with Thomas, and however different from the bond I thought I'd share with him when we brought him home.

7. Get away, when necessary.  Meg mentioned this, and it's important.  Anecdotally, parrots tend to do best with around 12 hours of sleep.  This appears to be less important with greys, but more important with the new world species and cockatoos.  Our birds are on a 7 pm - 7 am sleep schedule, which means that Thomas and I get a couple of hours every night to ourselves.  (We are ridiculous and go to bed at 9 as we wake at 5 every morning and need 8 hours of sleep!)

When we are home on the weekends for the entire day, the parrots, especially Rocky, tend to go into overload.  They are used to us being gone during the week, so a full day of us is a little too much for them to handle.  When it gets to that point, we put everyone in their cages and leave for a break.  This helps keep everyone happy.

When you're living with a difficult parrot, knowing that you will/can have a break can make all of the difference, which can help the time you spend together less stressful and even pleasant.

If anyone has any other suggestions of things that you've done to win over/happily live with a difficult parrot, I'd love to hear them, and it may be able to help someone else in a similar situation.

Little Brian

Thanks to all for your comments on my budgie dilemma.  I think I frequently fall into the trap of anthropomorphizing my animals and in trying to do what I think is best for them, I end up doing something they may not like.  After all, since parrots are flock animals, surely they'd prefer to have another of their own kind living with them, right?  Ha!  Just look how well that turned out for my caiques and greys.  Why don't I learn?

Luckily, that other budgie found a great home.  Later that day, I got a message about a tame budgie with neurological problems -- might I like to take him home?  I got that message after the deadline passed (another volunteer took him home) so didn't have to make any decisions there.  I think it's best Brian remain an only budgie.  Perhaps someday I can have a budgie hospice, with enough budgies so they can choose their own partners, and enough space so they can get away when they'd like.

As was pointed out to me, he's only ever lived with humans, and may not welcome a budgie companion.  Also, since some birds will try to drive out sick members of the flock, I wouldn't want anyone to harm him (due to his tumor) or for him to harm the newcomer.

All this talking and thinking about budgies made me appreciate Little Brian even more this weekend.  Thomas was drinking from a different water bottle than usual, and Brian was entranced:

He was singing and chirping to it; possibly because he could sense his reflection, but that doesn't necessarily mean he wants a friend -- he's got us!

Thomas was trying to read a magazine, but Brian wanted some attention:

He is well-mannered, so will jump off of the magazine for a page turn and then jump back on.  Reading around him can be a bit tricky as he does seem to find the article you're currently reading and stand right in the middle!

Stranded!

I am stranded in Boston. I waited at the airport for over 7 hours this afternoon/evening to take my flight home, when they finally informed us that they were canceling the flight and we'd have to rebook for Friday at the earliest!

This made me quite unhappy, as I am out of clean clothes and really wanted to get home. Luckily Thomas called around and got me a hotel reservation so I didn't have to worry about that; now I only have to sit and wait until I can get home again.

I asked how things were going with the parrots at home. Thomas said pretty well. Rocky apparently misses having his nemesis (me) around; though my husband could have been trying to make me feel better.

When I called him earlier, he told me that the greys were boycotting him -- they'd flown into the kitchen. They flew back to the living room when he was on the phone with me. I joked that they'd heard my voice, but it's more likely they were just being nosy. Max also bit Thomas twice -- something she never does. I think she misses me. Or at least the routine.

Beeps has apparently become aggressive against Brian, so Thomas has to stagger when they can be out, for Brian's safety. This is upsetting, but not unexpected, and one of the reasons I was hesitant to bring a budgie into our flock. We'll make it work.

Other than that, I don't really know what's going on, though I left the camera with Thomas, so I should have many updates and blog entries once I finally get home. Who knows when that will be.

I'm trying not to get too upset, as I can't change my situation. Unfortunately, there will be a lot of snow here tomorrow, so the T probably won't be running and I'll be stuck in the hotel. At least there are treadmills here and an attached bookstore. Thursday I'm hoping the weather will have calmed down enough for me to visit either the MFA or the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum. Or maybe I'll just mope in my room.

I had the most amazing pumpkin ravioli at my hotel this evening and may try to make it later this year. I wish I were home!

2010 review & 2011 preview

As I like to do every year, this is the perfect time to reflect on the past year and plan for the upcoming one. Reading last year's entry, some of my 2010 goals were met; others not so much!

I only read three French books, did not average yoga three time per week, and met none of my knitting goals. However, I did finally finish Citizens, as well as the Harry Potter series. I didn't think it was possible, but 2010 was an even better running year for me than 2009. More PRs (15K, half marathon, marathon), quite a few medals from placing in my age group at races, and a happy finish at the Boston Marathon.

I hope that the parrots had another good year. I think that they did, despite the fact that Rocky's dream of having Thomas to himself did not materialize as I am still around. We lost Daphne, whom I still miss deeply, daily. Brian joined our household, on almost the last day of the year. I know 2010 was the year that Steve's life turned around when he met Shannon. I look forward to following their journey as he continues to improve.

As for 2011, I'm hoping the good times continue! With any luck, Brian will be with us the entire year. Thomas might be presenting at a conference in Amsterdam and I'd then get to tag along as he'd extend his stay to include a week's vacation. If not, we're still going to try to get to Europe in the spring.

Of course, I also have fitness goals. I'm hoping to run at least 3 marathons this year, do 5,000 push-ups, and drastically increase the frequency of my weight lifting and yoga practice.

As usual, I hope to read at least 52 books, including 6 Pulitzer prize-winning novels. This year's Citizens will be Barbara Tuchman's A Distant Mirror, which has been on my bookshelf for over 8 years now.

I'm also hoping to make at least 12 new non-dessert recipes and knit something that I won't be embarrassed to give as a gift to someone (I am a very bad knitter!)

Lots of goals on my plate, and a fresh new year in which to accomplish them! I hope that everyone reading had a great 2010 and will have an even better 2011!

Happy fall!

I took a couple of pictures of the trees in our front yard. They are just so beautiful!I think fall might be my favorite time of year. The weather is just perfect, and squash and apples come into season. Running in the coolness is infinitely more pleasurable than in the searing heat.

As usual, we have lots of plans for the weekend, including attending a concert of rarely played medieval music. Hopefully some hiking/bird watching. A bit of brewing, some knitting, and running. I must lift weights for the first time in several months. Possibly some raking, given the state of our trees! And of course, lots of parrot-time. I need longer weekends!

We were up at the rescue yesterday (I go most Thursdays, but Thomas had to head up to do some grooming on recently-surrendered parrots). As usual, it was so hard not to take a bunch of these guys home. I am in love with a couple of greys, a couple of amazons, and a macaw. Among others.

Instead of taking anyone else home (Must. Have. Limits.), we returned to our house and smothered the parrots we already have with attention.

I hope everyone reading this has a fantastic weekend as well!

Bitey lovebird

D. Richard left the following comment on this post:

I have a peach faced lovebird that also demands attention seems to be quite happy but the moment you let her out she wants to bite . She will fly straight from the cage to your head or shoulder and within seconds will draw blood from your neck. I thought she was just hand shy and bites when she sees your hands so this last time I deliberately kept my hands down and away, and within 30 seconds she drew blood. Have you had a problem like this and how did you handle it?

Hello, D. Thanks for leaving a comment! I figured it would be easier to respond here instead of in the comments.

Since parrots are not "one answer fits all" birds and I tend to be a bit wordy anyway, I will write a bunch here; hopefully some of it will be useful!

And, just for fun, I will start with a picture of Thomas's favorite lovebird. She was adopted out about 5 years ago, and he still talks about her. She loved to hang out in the front pocket of his hooded sweatshirts!Back to the question. The first thing I would do is try to figure out what is happening when she bites. Maybe keep a journal. Does she fly over and bite every time you let her out of the cage? Is there ever a time when she doesn't? What's different? It's possible there is some kind of trigger. If you can identify and eliminate the trigger, you can eliminate the biting.

For example, my caique, Beeps, flies over and bites us if we read magazines on the couch. We can read books on the couch; we can read magazines in the rest of the house; but there is something about the magazine + couch equation that = bite.

You mentioned that she bites after 30 seconds on you. Will she step up for you, or are all of her movements her flying around? If she tends to bite after 30 seconds, I would only allow her on me for 20 seconds. Have her step up, possibly give her some kind of treat, or at least verbal praise for being so good, and put her somewhere where she can't bite you, like a playstand. Keep your physical interactions short and well within the time frame where she won't bite.

If she doesn't like hands, you might try to have her step up on a stick, or cover your hand with a washcloth. Many birds who are afraid of hands will happily step up on a hand that's covered with a shirt or towel.

The problem with biting is that, like with most things, practice makes perfect. Every time she bites, she's perfecting her technique. You want to do everything you can to avoid getting bit in the first place.

Does she give any physical clues that she's about to bite? Some parrots have extremely subtle body language, but they almost always have some signs that they are agitated and may bite. Pay special attention to her feathers -- does she fluff up before biting? Or spread out her tail? Since she knows how to fly, if you spot these clues ahead of time, you can toss her to an appropriate perch and escape danger (we do this with Beeps when he gets agitated.)

You mention in your question that she will fly to your head/shoulder and bite. That makes it hard to watch her body language! In our house, parrots are not allowed on our heads/shoulders (though they do try occasionally and I do have some of those pictures on our blog, but we generally discourage that.) The main reason is that you can't see body language when they're out of your field of vision, so she might be sending off all sorts of signals she's about to bite. If she were on your hand, you could have tossed her to a perch. The other reason is that a face bite is exponentially less pleasant than a bite anywhere else. I know several people who have had to have stitches in their face from a parrot bite. Even though this level of damage is unlikely with a lovebird, I still would not want to take that risk!

If you do want to keep her off of your head/shoulders, you need to try everything you can to prevent her from landing there. When my birds were leaning this rule, this sometimes meant I'd have to quickly drop to the ground or swerve my body so they couldn't land. I would not recommend this with a bird that's just learning to fly, but experienced flyers are able to alter their plan mid-flight and find an appropriate place to land.

Currently, when a bird lands on my head/shoulders, I immediately have them step up on my hand. If they resisted stepping up nicely, I would have to go back to not allowing them to land there in the first place.

Also, you could try giving her a lot of exercise when she first comes out -- a tired bird is less likely to bite! Get her flying, panting, and tired out! This really works for us with our severe macaw, Rocky. He is much less aggressive when he's exercised. (Also true for me!)

Finally, and this is not the solution I'd choose first, perhaps you need to clip his wings and work on teaching her appropriate behavior. We did this with Beeps. He was very effective at using biting in a previous home; in fact, his previous owner was in the process of releasing him outside in winter, to his certain death, when his rescuer happened upon him and saved his life. The reason? Apparently he'd bitten her so badly she needed to go to the emergency room for stitches. His rescuer, a wonderful person but with little parrot experience, kept him in his (large) cage for 9 months because the few times he came out, he flew at and attacked people.

Thomas and I took him in the day he was surrendered to foster him and teach him manners (then we adopted him.) The first thing we did was to clip his wings in order to work with him on appropriate behavior. When he could no longer effectively launch attacks, he learned that good behavior got him treats and attention and bad behavior was no longer effective.

One last thought that is purely anecdotal based on my experiences at the bird rescue. I have never seen anyone else mention this, so I could just be imagining things. Frequently, the birds that bite and attack the most are among the more intelligent birds. I'm probably anthropomorphizing, but in my mind, they get bored with captive life and start to act out -- just like gifted kids sometimes do in school.

I'm a big advocate of clicker training; here is a link to a free yahoo group that can get you started. Much of Beeps's undesirable behavior vanished once we gave him an outlet for his intelligence through learning tricks.

And, for more fun, I will add a picture of my favorite lovebird. He's still up for adoption, and it is a struggle not to bring him home after I visit!Good luck and hopefully some of this will be helpful. If you have additional information/questions/comments, please let me know and I will do my best to answer.

Thanks for caring enough about your lovebird to try to fix this problem instead of rehoming!

Fostering dilemma -- update

I am about to do much rambling.

Fostering Steve has gone beyond my wildest expectations. He improved so rapidly, though he still has a long way to go. Even better, he's found an amazing home, something that wouldn't have happened without this blog. It will be difficult to see him go, but I'm so happy for him to start his new life!

Several of my birds were intended to be fosters, but we fell in love with them and kept them. Although we've fallen in love with Steve, we promised ourselves that we would not keep him, and we're keeping that promise. I truly believe that Steve will have a better life in his new home than he would have had with us -- it's a much better fit. Rationally, we know that we can make a difference for more birds through fostering. Emotionally, it's hard to send them into that unknown.

We can work with damaged birds, get them to the point where they can happily live in a home, and find them that good home. I think it will always be hard to see them leave, but I'm planning on staying in touch with their new owners, will always take the bird back if problems arise, and I have 100% control over where the bird goes (an agreement I made with the rescue when we agreed to foster.) As Thomas said, we'll act as a sort of parrot halfway house.

Since I am a planner, I was thinking ahead to the time after Steve has gone. Should we just wait a week or two and bring the neediest bird into our home, or should we leave that space open until a truly needy bird is surrendered? That's what I thought my biggest dilemma was. Until this weekend.

A bird was surrendered to the rescue, in horrible shape. A long-time rescuer and the person who was the liaison for bringing this bird to the facility where I volunteer, wrote that, "This amazon by far is the worst case of abuse I have ever seen. I am still thinking about him and crying." His condition has brought several other long-time rescuers (including myself) to tears and sleepless nights. They weren't sure he'd survive the night -- it was that bad.

What to do?

He would be at my house right now if Steve's space were open. Is it fair to Steve to add this additional upheaval to his life, when he's about to go through so much change (currently unbeknownst to him)?

Steve goes home three weeks from Thursday. Can this new bird wait a month to come into our home? I actually have not gone up to see him yet; my information is based entirely on pictures and discussions with the woman who runs the rescue. I will go up during my normal time on Thursday, meet him, and discuss his condition further. His vet appointment is today, so we'll know more about his condition after that. And then we'll have some decisions to make.

Update -- I had made the decision that we couldn't bring anyone in to the house until after Steve leaves, but it was all unnecessary. At this bird's vet appointment, it was discovered that his condition was far worse than expected, and the only humane thing to do was euthanize.

Integrating a new severe macaw into the house

No, not me, don't worry! Though there is a severe macaw at the rescue who is trying his best to enter our household...

I received the following question in the comments, so I will answer it here. As always, I am no expert, but have interacted with hundreds of parrots over the years at the rescue and have successfully integrated several parrots into our flock. Also, as always, every parrot is an individual and there is no "one-size-fits-all" parrot advice, so I am talking in generalities and probabilities, even if I don't always qualify my comments as such!

On to the question, which I will intersperse with comments and then write more at the end...

Lisa wrote:

Thank you! Well I’ll start with my 2 biggest questions/concerns. Samba will come out of his cage and stand on the edge of the cage door. If we don’t immediately come to visit he will make a bit of noise and start bobbing his head up and down.

Me: This is great news!

He really acts like he wants to interact with us. Once we come to see him he will dance when we sing, and jabber with us for a few minutes. Then is seems out of nowhere he gets very anxious.

Me: Can you notice anything that he does right before getting anxious? Or that you do? I know it seems like it is out of nowhere, but carefully observe him and your interactions with him. Parrots can be extremely subtle. Does it happen if you lift an arm up (maybe in a dance move, but he's afraid you're going to ask him to step up), or does it happen after he pins his eyes, or lifts up the feathers on his head, or lifts his wings up, or does any other movement?

If you can't notice anything, look at timing. Is he OK for five minutes? Three minutes? Or is it sometimes three minutes and sometimes 20 seconds?

Ideally, you can figure out the trigger (or timing) and remove yourself from him before he gets agitated. In general, parrots benefit more from short, intense, frequent bursts of direct attention than long ones. Law of diminishing returns and all that. If you have an hour of direct attention, most parrots do better with 12 five minute interactions than one 60 minute interaction.

As an example, if he doesn't show agitation until over a minute in, dance with him for 30 seconds, then go away for a few minutes, then come back for another 30 seconds. Keep the interactions short and fun and leave him wanting more!

Although we are not attempting to reach for him, he starts yelling “come here Samba step up” right after he says this he will pin his eyes and begin biting his legs, then go back in his cage and appears freighted. It seems obvious that he is anxious that we are going to make him step up. We are not as I tried it once and was bitten and the same with my husband. I am trying to watch his cues to see what makes him uncomfortable so I can back off before he gets upset however it really seems to come out of now where. Well my question is since he appears so upset and is saying STEP UP!! at the same time that he runs and bites himself, should we not attempt to get him to step up?

Me: You have correctly picked up on his body language. Rocky will frequently bite his leg and then glare at me, or, if he's in his cage, reach for my finger and then pull his foot in and bite his leg, so this is very normal severe macaw behavior. (As an aside, one of the things I love about severe macaws is how flamboyant and expressive they are! I mean, biting a leg to show disapproval? Genius!)

As I said a few paragraphs up, if you can't figure out a trigger or any body language by him, concentrate on timing and focusing on short bursts of attention -- before he gets worked up.

As beloved parrot suggested in the comments, it is probably too soon for him to happily step up for you. Sure, you could force him to do so now, but you'd likely get bit and surely destroy trust, making it harder to have a good relationship with him down the road.

In your first comment, you mentioned "recently" bringing him home. Some birds take longer than others to feel comfortable in new situations. I know it's tough to not be able to handle him -- after all, you only want the best for him so why doesn't he understand and act accordingly? -- but giving him space, following his lead, and moving at his pace are so important to having a happy parrot in your house. Samba is only 10 years old, so he could be with you another 4 decades or so. In the grand scheme of things, an extra few months of slow progress is nothing!

As another aside, do you have any idea how his former owners had him step up? (From Samba's comments, it sounds like they may have had trouble getting him to step up). Some parrots feel more comfortable stepping up on hands vs. arms, towels or sticks vs. bare body parts, etc. This information might be helpful for you later on, but even if you don't have any contact with his former owners, you can still get him to a point where he steps up.

He does take fruit and vegetables from my hand very gently (but very leery).

Me: That's great that he will take food from you! One thing I do with a new bird is always say "want some?" or "want an almond?" and show them the food from a few feet away instead of just thrusting it in their face, then slowly go in and have them reach for it. This frames our interaction -- the bird chooses whether they want some, and comes a bit closer to me -- of his own volition -- to get some. I have a video of this with my foster bird near the end of this post.

Another way to build trust is to remove the bird's favorite foods from his normal diet. Does Samba have things that he really, really loves? Don't put them in his food dishes in his cage. He only gets them directly from you, so he makes the connection. This may mean going through his seed mix and removing cashews or pistachios or whatever!

I had read a bit about clicker training with a target. When I came within 5 feet of his cage with a chop stick he went ballistic and was visibly terrified. Now I’m not so sure that target training is the thing to do.

Me: Clicker training is fantastic and I do it with my parrots. Severes are very intelligent, and clicker training is fantastic for their mental fitness. Do you have a clicker? Have you conditioned the clicker with him and he's OK with that, it was just the chopstick that scared him? Or had you not gotten that far yet?

Conditioning the clicker is when you click and then give him his favorite food right away, as soon as you possibly can, so Samba learns that click = treat.

If he was afraid of the chopstick, you can use something else, like a straw (that's what I use), pen emptied of the ink cartridge, end of a fork, etc. You don't want to use anything perch-like, as that can cause confusion later on if you want to stick-train him. I do know that some people started by hiding most of the target stick in their sleeve and gradually took the target stick out after the bird was no longer afraid.

Or, even though it's advisable to start with target training, you don't have to. Once you've conditioned the clicker and Samba knows that click = treat, you can click/treat him for doing pretty much anything, like coming out of his cage and dancing. Here is a link to a free yahoo group that can provide advice, also. The moderators are much more experienced than I am and might have other ideas!

Lastly- he often will hang from the top of the cage with his beak while fanning his tail feathers and stretching his wings a bit. Would this be a happy display or does he want me to back off when he does this?

Me: Every parrot can use body language in a different way, so I can't give you a definitive answer. You'll have to observe the situations when he does this and his reactions to your reactions to this (hopefully that made sense -- it did in my head!) However, generally in the macaws that I've known, this is a type of begging behavior. He probably wants something -- attention, to come out, attention, treats, attention, etc.

That being said, since he is new to your house and doesn't feel totally comfortable yet, he might be a bit confused. Being a severe macaw, he wants attention (doesn't the world revolve around him? Because Rocky thinks it does!), but he is also a prey animal, so when he gets the attention from someone who might be a predator, it's a bit scary. Especially since it sounds like he was not receiving a lot of positive attention in his previous home.

If I were in your shoes, what I would do is start with verbal acknowledgment. When you see him doing this, say something like "Oh, Samba! What a pretty bird! Such a good boy!" preferably in a high, happy voice, and see what he does. If he gets excited, keep it up, and maybe slowly start approaching him over the next weeks.

I think this turned in to more than two questions :) I really appreciate you taking the time to respond!

Me: No problem! I hope that at least some of what I wrote was helpful and also that you keep us updated with Samba's progress. Just remember to be patient, follow his lead, and watch his body language. For being new to birds (if I read you correctly), you are already showing a great innate understanding of things! Rocky didn't have the best start, either, but we were able to get through that, and you can, too! Severe macaws tend to be very resilient and able to overcome their past. A year from now, you can reread this and probably won't even recognize him. Thank you for being willing to put forth the effort for Samba's sake!

Adding another bird to your flock

I got this question from Brittany in the comments:

I have an African grey, a blue and gold macaw, and a lovebird. I'm headed to Iowa for school in a couple weeks and am taking in a double yellow headed amazon (hoping it is just fostering for the couple who just had a baby and aren't managing well) after I get there. Do you have any advice for adding another bird to your flock? My grey plucks feathers when my schedule changes so I'm a bit worried about him, but my other two seem to just go with the flow.

First, I saw a picture of Sunny (the double yellow headed amazon referenced above) when I went over to Brittany's site to link to her, and he is absolutely gorgeous! Also, time for a confession: I LOVE amazons! They have such amazing personalities. They are flamboyant and let you know exactly how they feel. Don't tell my parrots, but I am currently having an extra-flock relationship with an amazon at the rescue where I volunteer and he has rekindled my love of these amazing creatures (also with a severe macaw, though I have mentioned him on the blog before)!

Brittany, you are in for a fun adventure! I must also add that, more than any other species of parrot, amazons are surrendered to the rescue due to new babies. Brittany, I hope for your sake that it does turn out to be just a foster (if that's what you want), but given my experiences, I wouldn't be surprised if it turns out to not be temporary.

Of course, every bird is an individual, but I will be making some species generalizations that I have observed during my years at the rescue.

First, of course, is the issue of the new bird's health. Since Brittany is a vet student, I'm mentioning this more for anyone who stumbles upon this, but you want to make sure that the new bird is healthy and won't infect your flock with anything contagious. Doing a quarantine in your house is ideal, but not always possible. In any case, you want to get the new bird to an avian vet as soon as possible for a check-up and to make sure they are healthy.

Second, especially in cases with mixed-sized flocks, is to be very aware of the damage that birds can do to each other. Once again, Brittany is already aware of this due to her experience and having a small, medium, and large bird in her house already, so this is more for other people who may find this. I have known of many cases where a beak or toe has been ripped off by another bird, sometimes resulting in death. It is very important to closely supervise because it only takes a second for something to happen.

Now, on to the fun stuff! The biggest thing I've learned through integrating birds into my flock is to watch the bird's body language and don't try to push them too far, too fast.

Generally, this shouldn't be as big of a problem with an amazon as it is with a grey. I wish I'd had this blog when I introduced Rocky and the caiques to our house to have as a comparison with Stella's and Steve's introductions. From what I can recall, Rocky was strutting around like he owned the place less than a week after coming home, and the caiques also quickly adapted.

At the rescue, many times amazons are talking and singing and begging for attention within a day or two of arrival, whereas the greys tend to open up only to certain people, and it takes them longer to do so.

In addition to watching body language, try to make yourself as valuable to the new bird as you can. That's what we're doing with Steve right now. I keep his favorite foods (pistachios, cashews, peanut butter, peas, apples) out of his food dish. He gets them directly from me, so that he starts to associate me with good things. It's a way to build trust.

Parrots are very empathetic and pick up on our body language. I try my best to never be angry or worried in front of my parrots, but especially not in front of a new bird with whom I haven't yet had time to build trust.

One of the great things about amazons is how expressive they are! Over the years, I've interacted with over a hundred amazon parrots, and they just can't hide their feelings. This is great because you get instant feedback if you're pushing the bird beyond its comfort zone, and it makes it much less likely for you to get bit as long as you heed the warnings!

I'm not sure if anything I've written will be helpful, Brittany, since you have so much experience already. Just watch Sunny, follow his cues, and you'll do great. I can't wait to see your progress on your blog!

Oh, and that amazon smell, and the way they dance, and their ecstatic reaction when showered, I could go on and on...

Question on flight

I received the following question in the comments of this post. Since my answer is likely to be long, I decided to turn it into a post instead of responding in the comments:

Speaking of negative behavior, do you have any behavioral problems allowing the birds full flight? What about poop? My CAG is clipped but does take off for short flights to the ground. I've been thinking about not clipping (cats) but he is potty trained right now and I do not want to lose that. Thoughts?

As always, thanks for the question! Personally, I am pro-flight as long as the situation is safe for the parrots and people in the house, so my response is likely to be biased in that direction! While I do recognize that each family needs to make the clip or not decision based on their individual circumstances and those of the bird, I feel that far too many make the clip decision. The article that made the biggest impact on me, and was the impetus for allowing Max's flight feathers to grow out is "Feathers, Flight, and Parrot Keeping" by Pam Clark.

So, on to some of my ramblings in answering the first question about behavioral problems due to flight. In my house, all of my current birds (except our foster bird who has only been with us 4 days and therefore hasn't grown out his flight feathers) have the ability to fly.

Max (TAG), Stella (CAG), and Beeps (BHC) are really good flyers. They most frequently choose flight at their transportation method. Calypso (BHC) almost never flies. I do toss him to his stand or cage, and he likes that, but his preferred transportation method is leaning where he wants to go and beeping until I take him there. Rocky (severe macaw) has just begun flying down to the ground, but usually walks where he wants to go. Therefore, even having a flighted bird, does not guarantee flight! However, since the grey in question is already gliding down to the ground, I'd expect him to pick up flying quite quickly.

Since you specifically mention your grey, I will mostly restrict my observations to my own greys. We had Max for around 4-5 years before we allowed her to fly. We never even considered allowing her to fly for the first few years -- clipping was just what good parrot owners do. Plus, every time her flight feathers would grow in, and she could fly a bit, her personality would change. She got snippier, harder to control. As soon as we clipped her, we got our sweet Max back.

After Max had her feather destruction issues in 2006, I did a ton of research and allowing her to fly was one of the things we decided to try to optimize her environment so she would stop plucking. It was one of the best parrot-keeping decisions we ever made.

In the article linked to above, Pam Clark makes the following statement, and I couldn't agree more:

From personal experience, I believe that flighted birds are more fun to have as companions. They are so much better able to reveal their personalities through movement of choice.

Max's relationship with us has blossomed in ways we never could have imagined when she was clipped!

That being said, having a flying bird can be much more of a challenge, especially in the beginning when you're redefining behavior expectations.

Of course, there are the safety aspects. We use a double door policy to ensure that no one escapes. We make sure no one is perched on top of an open door before we close it.

There's also the potential damage to your house, which is magnified when the bird can go wherever they want.

And the poop issue, which I will touch on more later.

I think also a major mind set change needs to take place for some people when a bird can fly. At least it did for us! When your bird is clipped, generally you can put him/her on a perch and she stays there. (This isn't true for all birds -- Rocky proves that as he just climbs down from the perch and goes where he wants.) When the bird is flighted, he can go wherever he wants. So you have to work in conjunction with your bird to make sure that appropriate perching places are where the bird wants to be. The relationship becomes much more of a partnership.

Proper training is a must! I know some people who brag they have flighted birds. However, they haven't trained their birds on acceptable flighted behavior, so the birds spend almost all of their time in their cages because they get into trouble otherwise. How is it a benefit to the bird to be able to fly if they are now cage bound?

With both of our greys, the first few weeks after they realized they could fly were quite trying. In a sense, I think of it like a child with controlling parents who goes off to college and goes wild. For so long, we controlled where our greys went, and suddenly, they realized they could go wherever they want! If we wanted them to step up, they could just fly away! We just worked through this period, and after a few weeks, after the novelty of flying wore off, things were fine. I must add, though, that our bird sitter still has problems with Max just flying away instead of going in her cage. She has to use cashews to bribe Max to go inside.

We changed our approach to the parrots -- making acceptable perching places attractive and not allowing them on unacceptable places. Teaching them recall, which is a fun game, gets them off of unacceptable places, and should hopefully help us to recover them should they, despite our best efforts, ever get loose outside.

One great benefit to flying is the exercise aspect. While it's possible for non-flighted birds to get exercise, it's far easier when they're flying. We've noticed huge behavioral improvements in our birds when they get panting several times a day. I know how squirrelly I get when I don't run for a couple of days. Imagine these natural athletes, who in the wild would be flying all of the time, denied that possibility. Flying/exercising gives them a positive outlet for their energy. Max almost never squawks in displeasure anymore -- her vocalizations are pleasant. If she's unhappy, she can move somewhere else.

Looking back on things, in the short term, allowing a previously non-flighted bird to fly can be a lot of work. There's additional training, getting used to the improved safety measures, etc. But, in the long term, I think it's actually easier to live with flighted birds. They are so much more enjoyable to be around; they show off more of their personality. In addition, when we go from the kitchen to living room, instead of making a ton of trips ferrying the parrots from perches to cages, they either follow us by themselves, or we toss them into the other room.

As for your second question, our birds are not trained to poop in one place, so I'm not sure how much help I'll be here! When our greys come out of their cages, we hold them over the trash can and they both eliminate then, but subsequent eliminations happen wherever they are. That's part of the reason we don't have any carpet in the areas of the house where they are allowed! We watch them closely and try to clean them up as soon as they happen. We also wash our floors very regularly.

However, with training, a flighted bird, especially one who is already trained, could be taught to fly to a certain perch to go.

One final thing to consider, especially with regards to greys, is the issue of heart disease. If you google "african grey heart disease" many links come up. The vet at the rescue where I volunteer is generally anti-flight for parrots, as she believes that most families are not equipped to live safely with a flighted bird. Even she recommends that people with greys allow them to fly, for health reasons.

I hope this was somewhat helpful, but if I didn't answer something completely, or if you have any other questions, as always, please feel free to ask again. I'm certainly no expert, but am always happy to share my experiences!

Radius of calm

Last night, Thomas spent the night at the hospital. As I've mentioned before, the parrots are much needier when I'm alone with them. I'm really not sure if it's normal neediness, but I notice it more because there's not someone else to take some of the pressure? Or if they worry that since Thomas isn't here he's not coming back so they actually are needier? Who knows!

In any case, last night I let out all of the parrots, with the exception of Daphne, who stayed in her cage for her own safety (she got out a little later when I could supervise). They were in the living room. I went into the kitchen to finish reading the paper.

Within a few minutes, all of the room-mobile parrots (the parrots who actually leave rooms by flying/walking -- Max, Rocky, Beeps, and Stella) were in the kitchen. They flew/walked to their stands. Soon they started closing in on me. A few minutes after their arrival, they were all within a 1 foot radius of me!

Beeps was on my lap, seeking refuge from Max who likes to chase him. Stella had flown to the back of my chair. Max and Rocky were standing on the newspaper I was trying to read; Max was also pushing her head into my hand so that I would pet her.

I tried to give everyone enough attention, but they were insatiable! After a few minutes, I put everyone on their stands again, started making dinner, and told them to give me a three-foot radius of calm -- meaning no parrots allowed within three feet of me.

Of course they did not comply.

Dreams

Thomas woke up angry with me. I knew something was up during the night because he'd built a blanket wall against me and slept further away from me than usual.

I got an answer this morning.

He had a dream that I let Max escape. Even though he eventually found her, he was so angry that I had allowed this to happen that he let it affect his behavior towards me! (I said, "So basically your dream was what actually happened in 2005?")

After a quick check this morning to make sure she was safe in his cage, he left for work, marital peace restored.

(Also, I had had a vivid dream about caiques. We are very weird.)

*************************
On another topic, Rocky has been so pleasant with me lately. I still make sure to keep a stick with me at all times, in case he's trying to lull me into a false sense of security. However, our paths cross multiple times a day in the hallways of our house (for instance, I'm walking into the living room and he's heading towards the kitchen) and he hasn't made any threatening gestures. Even his head feathers have stayed smooth against his head and his wings have not opened to show me how big and scary he is.

This is probably just a cycle in our relationship, but I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts!

Arranging a successful environment

One of the most important realizations Thomas and I had when dealing with our parrots incorporated a change in our thought process. We're still working on doing this, as we're certainly not perfect, but I thought I'd blog about it in case it might be helpful to anyone else dealing with a parrot with behavioral issues.

Arrange the environment for success.

This certainly won't solve all issues -- these are wild animals living in our houses -- but it went a long way in creating harmony in our house.

In the beginning, when Max would do something unpleasant, we'd ask ourselves how we could change her behavior so that she'd do what we wanted/expected. This didn't pop up too frequently since Max was about the most perfect bird anyone could ask for. She rarely made unpleasant noises, was happy destroying her toys instead of our house, didn't bite, etc. Of course, she was still a baby, couldn't fly to cause mayhem in unexpected places, and was outnumbered 2 to 1 by the humans in the house, so we could keep an eye on her. If I'd had a blog in 2002, it would have been extremely boring.

After we started adding more parrots to the house, especially those who'd learned inappropriate behavior in a previous home, this became more of an issue. We're now outnumbered 6 to 2.

Somewhere along the way, we made the realization that it is so much easier to change our own behavior than our parrot's (or parrots') behavior. By watching our parrots, knowing what interests them, and trying to stay one step ahead of them, we'd be able to avoid many issues before they became problems! Also, we are asking them to make so many accommodations to us (living in captivity), so we can make a few accommodations of our own.

Let me give a few examples.

1. Beeps attacks us if we're on the couch and reading a magazine or catalog. He does not attack if we are on the couch reading a book or reading a magazine elsewhere. It is a very peculiar trigger! Instead of trying to figure out a way to get Beeps to accept magazine reading on the couch (I likely could have used clicker training to accomplish this), we no longer read magazines on the couch. We read them in the kitchen, or upstairs, but why upset Beeps unnecessarily? Plus, I'd rather use our clicker training time to teach him fun tricks!

2. When Stella first came to us, she was fascinated by the stove. Her favorite perch was a burner. Obviously this was something we needed to work on (and have -- she no longer views the stove as a play gym). However, until we knew that she wouldn't go to the stove, we put her in her cage whenever we were cooking. I didn't want to risk her going up in flames.

3. Sometimes Max likes to eat the mini blinds covering the window next to her cage. Instead of figuring out a way to get her to stop, we moved her cage a fraction of an inch further into the living room so even when she stretches she can't get at the blinds.

I could list so many more. When faced with behavior by one of our parrots that we don't want to encourage, we try to first think, "what can we do to change this situation?" Can we keep the apples in the fridge instead of the counter so no one goes over and nibbles on every single one? Can we keep Rocky in his cage until after I change the parrots' food and water so that he doesn't sneak attack me while my hands are full? Can I put a bottle of shampoo at the edge where the top of the shower door meets the wall so the greys won't chew the wall? Can I close my bedroom door when I do yoga so Rocky doesn't sneak away from Thomas and ruin my peaceful time?

You get the idea. The more we got into this, and saw it working, the more we took it as a challenge to continue avoiding problems instead of reacting to them. Of course, this can't solve everything, but it's a good start, at least in my experience!

Snowday

I took an unexpected vacation day from work yesterday as there was more snow than I like to drive in. Luckily I have a very flexible job and boss!

I had to take two conference calls (so I suppose not exactly a vacation day!) and was a bit worried about doing this with loud parrots in the house. Luckily, all they did was beep and make other mechanical-sounding noises. My boss told me he couldn't hear them, though he may have and just thought that someone had a microwave alarm going off in the background.

During the past two years, the heavy snow fell came when Thomas had to spend the night at the hospital. Seriously. The weathermen could have saved time doing their forecasts and just looked at Thomas's call schedule to announce feet of snow. I do not even want to think about how many hours I spent shoveling.

That has not been the case this year! Thomas is on vacation this week, so he got to do the snowblowing (I don't like using the snowblower and will shovel instead).I'm glad I live in an area that is used to snow. The roads were great today. My friends who live in DC have told me they're not as lucky.

Answering a comment

I received this comment on a post from earlier this year:

Hi Even tho this is a macaw page i would to have some advise on my 15 month oh thinmen african grey. i am trying to train her to let me strok her wings let me stroke her head out of the cage as she onli alows this if she is in the cage with the door closed she also bites when you get her to step up of her cage or on somwhere where she has gone her self, i have tried rewarding her but when i give her the food she just throws it i've also tried a high pitched exited voice to praise which she just looks at me funny. basically i would like to get tips on how to make her tame where i can stroke her anywhere as you can tell she is dying for the attension, sadly she cannot be out of her cage throughout the day as we have three dogs that would like her for dinner but she comes up to my room when i get home from schools for about too hours a night and when i clean her cage but she has got toys to play with thank you too any one who relpies really need advice thanks

I have a timneh grey and a congo grey also, so hopefully some things that I write can be applicable to your situation.

1.My first question is: why do you want to stroke her wings? In general, this is a bad idea. Since she's so young, you probably won't see breeding behavior yet, but you want to do everything you can to not send her mixed signals, which might save you from hormone-related issues down the road. Touching/stroking on the wings is something that parrots save for their mates. Since, no matter how hard you try, you can never be a true mate to her, you don't want to confuse her. Keep your petting to the head area.

Greys in general do not tolerate touching. Of course, there are always exceptions, but your grey does not appear to be one! I've had my timneh for almost 8 years; she is extremely bonded to both my husband and me. She loves getting her head scratched, but does not like any touching below her neck. If I were to go up and try to pet her wings, I'd likely get bit -- and with good reason. I need to respect her boundaries. You wouldn't like it if people came up to you and started shoving their fingers in your ears; it's basically the same thing with her.

Watch her body language closely. If you insist on trying to touch her wings, she will likely have to become more aggressive to keep you away. This will serve only to make her a better biter, and for her to not want to be around you. You don't want this!

It's hard sometimes to remember that greys are wild animals. They are not little people. As people, we like to cuddle and hug -- it's our way of showing affection. But for prey animals like grey parrots, that can be terrifying. If my grey's wings are constricted by me petting her, that means she can't make an escape if a dangerous situation arises. My greys show their affection for me by perching on my arm, preening my fingers, and verbally (like mimicking what I do or when we whistle back and forth).

2. Does she always bite you after she steps up? If it's only sometimes, can you see a pattern? Long-term, you need to figure out a way to make her want to be near you. My parrots love stepping up for us because they like to be near us. Maybe we'll dance, or I'll whistle to them, or we'll take a shower. You want to make stepping up something that she wants to do.

You say you've tried feeding her but she just throws the food on the ground. Maybe you're not feeding her the right kind of food? I don't like cupcakes, so if someone was trying to reward me with cupcakes, it wouldn't work! But promise me pie and I'll do whatever you want!

Here's something to try: give her a bowl of seed and see what she eats first. Do this for several days to find a pattern and see what her favorite foods really are. My timneh LOVES cashews. She will do almost anything for one. She hates almonds. Therefore, if I tried to train her with almonds, we wouldn't get anywhere!

Once you know what your grey's favorite foods are, remove them from her daily diet. Let's say her favorite food is also cashews, for this example. If you feed her a seed mix, go through it and take out all of the cashews before you put it in her cage. If she wants her favorite food, she has to work for it! There is no incentive for her to work for you if she can get cashews in her cage.

Going back to the step-up issue, one thing you can try is to show her a cashew (or her favorite food, which I'm pretending is cashews, for simplicity's sake). Then ask her to step up. As soon as she steps up, immediately give her the cashew. This serves two purposes. First, she comes to associate stepping up on you with her favorite food! Second, she can't bite you if her mouth is full of cashew. She's less likely to throw it on the ground if she only gets them occasionally (as opposed to always having them available).

If she continues to bite, you may want to consider stick-training her. This is what we did with our macaw. He'd rather bite me than step up, and will bite Thomas in certain circumstances (like if he's in a particular hallway in our house).

3. As I've mentioned, parrots are prey animals and can become very stressed out by having predators looking at them. Even if she is safe in her cage, she may not feel safe if the dogs are staring at her. Can you move her cage to a room where the dogs are not allowed? It may also help to put some big toys up or cover half of her cage so that she has somewhere safe to retreat to if she feels scared. When parrots are scared, they will often lash out by biting. You want her to feel safe with you. I will try to take pictures of this tonight so you can see what I mean.

4. I mention this frequently, but I think you guys would be wonderful candidates for clicker training. Here is a link to a free yahoo group. In their files, you can learn how to do this. Using these methods, my timneh grey has learned several dozen tricks, like wave, take a bow, shake hands, fly to me, putting a bead in a cup, etc. Greys are very, very smart, and I'm sure she'd love the opportunity to learn new things and show off for you!

Clicker training is a wonderful way to create and cement a bond between you and your parrot. It's also a wonderful way to learn her body language. Even though most parrots can talk, the vast majority of their communication is done via body language. They are very expressive once you learn to listen to them!

I hope some of what I've written may be helpful to you. It is very good to hear that you are worried about her and are trying to provide her with a good home! Please let me know if you have any other questions, and if anyone else has any suggestions/comments, please put them in the comments!

More on severe macaws

My post on severe macaws has been attracting a lot of traffic lately. I received this comment from Darlene, which I thought I would address here instead of in the comments from last year:

I am grateful for finding this website, We purchased a severe Macaw approx. 4 years ago when she was just a baby.(Just coming off of being hand fed) Being new to birds(Never having one) we were told all the wonderful things about this bird. Great talkers with a large vocabulary. Sweet and easy to take care of. Loving, smart, etc etc. This was true to some extent, she was a sweet bird who was content to both myself and my husband. She is now approaching 5 years old. A few months ago my son who lives very far from me came to visit/ she flew at his shoulder and bit him, his reaction was to get her off and he knocked her off his shoulder. she hit wall and was a little frightened. She lost all her tail feathers, (Which grew Back). Never seeing this kind of behavior from her, I defended her actions as being, (She was going to land on his shoulder and was slipping, so she bit his neck to steady herself). Now she has decided that my husband is her enemy. She always had a good relationship with him. so again I defended her actions.

1. She has flown on his shoulder and bit his neck 2 or 3 times.

2. He was going down the steps and she was on my shoulder as I was following him. She (Rickie is her Name) few on his back and bit his neck again.

3. Yesterday he was getting ready for bed. She was sitting on the bed being very calm. All of a sudden she flew on his bare back and bit his back muscle.

4. She has flown at his face twice and bit his nose, breaking the skin and causing bleeding.

This is becoming very alarming. I'm glad I read your blog. It has really helped me to understand what she is doing. I wish I had not been lied to when we were purchasing a bird. We do love her, but I am at odds on what to do. We are taking her to get her wings clipped tomorrow and hope that settles her down. Any advice??

Oh by the way, Rickie has chewed the bathroom door and ate the wallpaper. AND she was not lacking for any attention. We took her everywhere with us. She has a clear cage that we use. She goes to work with me( I own my own real estate Business) I have a cage for her there. I had to stop taking her, because she would not let me talk to anyone. HELP

It is actually quite timely for me to start writing about severe macaws again. Yesterday, I was up at the rescue where I volunteer and interacting with the severe macaw we have that's currently up for adoption. This little guy reminds me so much of Rocky -- he even has an enlarged preen gland! In the hour he was out yesterday, he bit two people and threatened a few more. He also made us all laugh several times. I worry because I know how hard it will be to find a good home for him.

In any case, Darlene, I'm glad you found my blog, though I'm sorry that you had to. Everything you describe with Rickie is very typical severe macaw behavior. Since I'm writing this on the fly, it may be a bit disjointed. Please let me know if you have any questions or if I'm unclear at all.

It seems like your biggest problem right now is the attacks on your husband. The most important thing is to try to arrange the environment so that she can't bite him. Like most things, practice makes perfect, and every time she bites him, she refines her talent and becomes a better biter.

Getting a wing trim is a great first step. In general, I'm a big proponent of allowing birds to fly in the house, as long as it can be done safely. Since she is using her flight ability to launch aerial attacks on your family members, it is no longer safe. A wing trim may calm her down a bit, but the biggest advantage is that your husband no longer has to worry as much about being attacked from all angles. Notice that I qualified my last sentence. If she is currently a strong flier, she will still be able to fly somewhat even after her wing trim. In a few weeks, after her flight muscles atrophy a bit, the distance she can fly will diminish. However, she may still jump on him, or attempt to land on him, fall short, and then run over and attack his feet.

One nice thing about severe macaws is that they are very expressive. Figure out what Rickie's triggers are. It may help to keep a journal, or bite book, to record everything you can about what was happening when she bites. Are there certain areas of the house where she is more likely to bite? Certain actions that you or your husband do? Or clothes that you wear? Look for patterns. Watch her body language closely.

For example, in my case, Rocky becomes very aggressive in the hall outside our bathroom. Even Thomas (his favorite person) does not attempt to pick him up in this area unless he has a stick. Rocky also will launch attacks and try to bite if we are carrying towels. To solve this problem, we make sure he is in his cage, or at least another room, before we touch any towels. As for clothes, Rocky does not like it when Thomas wears red shirts. As frustrating as it was for Thomas to let a macaw dictate his wardrobe (especially since his favorite shirt was red), he no longer wears red shirts.

As in the examples above, one you've figured out things that provoke Rickie to bite, you can arrange the environment so that she doesn't get so worked up.

Another thing that worked for us is that we stick trained Rocky. This gives me a way to move him around or to stop him from attacking me. Thomas will also use the stick when Rocky is particularly agitated. I use a dowel. The ones we have were perches in cages (we replaced the dowels with natural manzanita wood) but you can also buy them at stores like The Home Depot.

If you choose to do this, you may have to make adjustments depending on Rickie's reaction to the stick. In our case, Rocky already knew "step up." I simply placed the stick where my hand would be, said "step up," and then praised him when he did. Rocky loves praise, even from me, so that's a great reinforcer. If Rickie is not as hungry for praise, you may have better luck giving her a nut or special treat after she steps up on the stick. Practice daily until it becomes routine. By now, if Rocky sees me with a stick, he'll run over and put his foot up. If he sees me with a stick in my hand, he will not even attack because he knows it's futile.

I have three sticks that I keep in various rooms in the house, and strive to always have one within arm's reach so that if he does come over to attack, I just have him step up instead. One quick note about stick training -- parrots tend to like to be as high as possible. If your husband has her on a stick, but the stick is horizontal, she may just walk over and bite him. I always keep the stick at an angle so that he'd really have to climb down to get me -- and it's not worth the trouble for him. I can't find any pictures of that, though I'll try to take some over the weekend; however, this post shows arm angles when sticks aren't involved -- it's the same when they are.

I really think those were the two most important aspects of how Rocky and I live as peacefully together as we do -- figuring out what sets him off and reducing/eliminating his triggers, and stick training.

Now, on to other ideas:

1. What is her diet like? I know several birds who became increasingly aggressive when fed artificial dyes and/or too much unhealthy human food. Kind of like when kids get hyped up on sugar. You may want to switch her to a non-colored pellet, like Harrison's or Totally Organic Pellets, and limit human food to healthy vegetables.

2. How much exercise does she get? Even when a bird flies, they're not always getting a ton of exercise if they only go for short distances. In the wild, parrots can fly miles every day. We try to get all of our birds panting at least once a day. If they're having behavior issues, we try to get them panting more often. Here is a post I wrote about exercise, including a video with Rocky.

3. I am a huge fan of clicker training. Here is a link to a free yahoo group where you can get started. This is a way to channel some of her energy/intelligence into more positive endeavors. Rocky would rather bite me than take food from my hand, so when I train him, I just praise him. Progress is slow, but he has learned a few tricks this way!

4. Does she have a lot of stuff to chew? Rocky is like a little buzz saw. Every single severe macaw I've encountered is the same way. He loves 2X4 slices. I don't know how handy you or your husband are, but what we do is buy untreated pine 2X4s from our local lumberyard. Then Thomas slices them with a miter saw. When he's making wood chips, he can't attack me, or scream, or eat our furniture. We keep baskets of these slices around our house. When he feels the need to destroy, he runs over and grabs a piece of wood. In this post, you can see what I mean.

5. Thomas has made the comment about Rocky being a cowardly biter. That means that he generally won't launch at me if I'm facing him -- he waits until my back is turned. Though I sometimes joke that it's like I'm a courtier to King Louis XIV, if he's agitated I will walk backwards out of the living room.

As other thoughts come to me, I will add them. By using the techniques described above, my husband and I have worked out an arrangement that works for us with Rocky. I can't remember the last time he bit me and drew blood. Off the top of my head, I'd estimate that he bites me less than 2 times a year. But I am very vigilant. He jumped me last week, and I was able to get him off of me (basically using a stick to scrape him onto the couch) before he could inflict any damage. In many cases, it's like living with my nemesis, or my stalker.

Thank you very much for trying to find solutions to working with Rickie instead of just rehoming her. They are very challenging creatures, and she is very lucky to have landed with someone who cares enough to make things better. As before, if you have questions/comments on anything I wrote, or on anything else, please leave a comment and I will respond. Best of luck to your family and Rickie!

Parrots and yoga

Doing yoga in a home with parrots is not as peaceful as it would be in a home without them!

I was doing a 40 minute session yesterday, and for at least half of that time, the greys were whistling, singing, talking... Good thing I'm doing this mostly for the physical and not mental benefits!

However, it was still better than the time when I was doing yoga upstairs and Rocky walked in the door! Thomas had let him out and then didn't supervise very well -- Rocky made it up the stairs unnoticed. Luckily he started laughing when he got close to me so I was able to extricate myself from a potentially sticky situation in a safe manner.

In a similar vein, after I got home from work yesterday I had to go outside to shovel. It was strangely peaceful. No snowblowers, nobody else outside; only the distant hum of traffic on the highway...and near-constant beeping from Beeps that I could clearly hear outside, through our closed house. Luckily that lasted for only 5 minutes until peace returned. Does he always beep for 5 minutes after we leave the house? Or did he know that I was still within hearing distance?